02 April 1998

Jason and Malcolm

Hello!

I'm sorry I haven't written in awhile.   We went back to Sydney last weekend.    Jason was there this time.   Last time we were there he had been in Perth so I didn't have to worry about visiting him.   

It's not that I don't want to visit him.   I like him.  But I felt it would be weird visiting him in Sydney without being able to tell him why we were there.

And you know what....it was weird.    Actually, it was weird and stressful.   On top of my big secret, I had to lie because I didn't tell Jason I had been in Sydney before.   That was really stupid of me.  Well, I didn't really lie exactly.   It's more like I kept quiet when he showed me places.  I acted as if it were the first time I ever saw it.   Finally, I couldn't take it anymore and blurted out that I had been to Sydney in February.   

Of course Jason was totally confused about why I'd not say something in the first place.   I told him it was because I felt bad that we came when he was in Perth.   That made me look really daft.  

Then Jason wanted to spend all this time with me, and I also wanted to spend time with Malcolm and my other new wizard friends.   But I couldn't take Jason with to that, and I felt like I kept ditching him.  

I told Malcolm how I was feeling about Jason and he said "Oh, you don't need that Muggle as your friend.".   I got really mad and we got into a huge fight.   I ended up crying.  He said he didn't mean it in an offensive way, and was just trying to make me feel better.

How could that make me feel better? 

My dad says Malcolm is probably jealous of Jason.

He might be right.   I emailed Malcolm yesterday and told him my Jason news.   Jason is coming here for his Autumn holiday.    Then Malcolm wrote me back and asked if I wanted to come and stay with them for a few weeks; the same weeks that Jason will be in Kiama.   Malcolm said we could practice my magic together.  

I am not magic!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Is he ever going to believe me about that?

I wish I was excited about Jason coming because he's one of the nicest people I know.   He's so sweet.   But I'm not excited, because every time I see him I feel guilty about the wall that's between us.

My mum says I should just go ahead and tell him the big secret.   She says she's going to break the secrecy thing soon.  She's writing down all this information and is going to send it to the Australian government.   Why?   Because she thinks you-know-who is going to win, and she thinks he won't stop with England.   She says we need Muggles to band together with good wizards to fight against the evil wizards who plan to take over the world.

My dad has been begging her not to do this.   He still thinks Harry Potter will save the day.  He says if the secrecy thing is broken, Julia will be in danger.   Will she be?   I don't know.   Some people might be scared and try to hurt her, but I think other people will help protect her.     

My dad had an idea for me.   He says if I want to tell Jason everything, why don't I just change the names of everyone and turn it into a fictional story.   That way I can be honest with him, and.....

It's not really honest though.   Is it?  

I guess it's half-honest.

I don't think I'm that good at writing stories though.    

5 comments:

Aoife said...

Alex, relationships are very complicated, but one fact is simple: No relationship can work if one half cannot be herself. It sounds like you cannot be with either Jason or Malcolm.

You need to be able to say what you think and feel, to be the person you are rather than the person someone else wants you to be, to be as open as possible. I'm not saying you need to be completely honest because people are allowed to, and sometimes need to, keep secrets, but you can't feel overwhelmed by guilt for needing to keep those secrets.

I disagree with your mum; you have a huge secret you must keep. Do NOT reveal our world to Jason. Now is not the time. Even in the best of times, I would say your relationship has not progressed to the point where the wizarding world should be revealed to an outsider. We are in a time of war and making such a revelation would endanger you, your family, Jason, his family and other members of the wizarding community.

Additionally, I urge you to dissuade your mum from breaching the International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy. The wizarding world does not look kindly upon muggles knowingly violating this law, and punishment is likely to be severe in our current climate. Additionally, were she to violate this law, your mum would face the very real threat of being deported to the UK for the Ministry to deal with her. At best, your mum's memory would be altered and she'd be labeled as mad by the muggle community. At worst ... well, I think you have a good idea what that could be.

The UK wizarding community has already concluded that YKW likely intends to take this war beyond the UK and is working with the international wizarding community to stop YKW in his tracks. Several muggle governments, including the Australian, have already been appraised of and are involved in the situation. To put it bluntly, your mum needs to butt out and let the professionals handle it. She won't be helping; rather, she'll simply be endangering all of you.

I'll have to stop here because a group of us are heading out in a few minutes on a recon mission. Just think about what I've said, Alex. I know you're in a tough position - you've got a foot in both worlds - but you need to keep one hidden from the other, at least for now.

JULIA said...

I told mum that the government will just think she's crazy if she tries to tell them about our world.

And Alex is a drama queen. It's not that big a deal to keep a secret.

Alex, get over yourself. No offence.

Miss Muggle Bug said...

Julia,

Maybe it's not a big deal to you. But it's a big deal to me.

I don't really expect you to understand. So...never mind.

Miss Muggle Bug said...

Aoife,

I talked to my mum about what you said. She said if you guys can't stop what's happening in England, why should we trust you to stop it from happening around the world?

She said though that she won't say anything to anyone unless she feels we're in danger again. She's still really mad about what happened with Rhyden's family.

I'll follow your advice and not tell Ryan anything...even though it is a big deal for me.

If Julia wants to call me a drama queen. Fine.

I really don't care anymore.

Lynette said...

JULIA,
I agree with you... about the government thinking your mum is crazy. They will.

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